Making Vanilla Extract - Part 1

If anyone would were to look under our bed right now I would be the guest of honor at an intervention.  There is currently alcohol under my bed. 

Why is there alcohol under my bed?  Obviously, if you keep the monsters liquored up they make great karaoke partners.  Duh!  And, because I’m making vanilla extract.

If you hadn’t noticed, I have a bit of a sweet tooth.  I enjoy making desserts, which means I require a lot of vanilla.  Pure vanilla extract can be expensive around here.  And, if you are using imitation vanilla know that whenever I look at you I am silently mocking you when I smile.  I’ve always planned to make my own, but I never seemed to get around to it.  Until now!

It is a very simple recipe and what it requires most from you is patience.  You’re going to have to wait a month or two to harvest your extracted goodies, but that is the hardest work you’ll have to do with this recipe.

From what the all knowing Google tells me, different alcohols can give your extract a different taste.  Because I’m curious about such claims and have no issues with looking like a cheap drunk walking out of the liquor store in broad daylight, I made two different extracts.

Did I mention that bourbon tastes great in whipped cream?  I usually mention that.

 What You’ll Need:

• 1 Cup of Alcohol.  Liquor.  Hooch.  I went with some very cheap vodka and bourbon, but vodka is most popular.
• 3 Vanilla beans
• A glass jar

 1.  Clean out your jar.  Glass can hold smells.  You don’t want pickle smell in your vanilla extract.  Only 13 year old boys will want it, and that’s because they will eat anything on a dare.  Take some vinegar and shake it around in your jar.  Rinse and do a sniff test.  If it smells okay move on to step two.  If not, repeat your vinegar swish or let it sit overnight.  Or, you know, get a new jar.

I keep a lot of vinegar on hand at all times.  If I tell you why you won't be able to unknow it.

2.  Cut your vanilla beans lengthwise with a paring knife, and put them in the jar.  Cutting in a straight line was harder than I thought it would be, but I also decided it didn’t matter that much.

What do you expect?  I failed cut and paste in kindergarten.

 3.  Measure out a cup of vodka/bourbon/rum/whiskey/whatever you drink to make the pain go away.  I'm not judging.  At least, not to your face.

If you put the bottle in the bathroom you can tell people it's medicine.

 4.  Pour your liquor of choice over the vanilla beans and try to keep the beans submerged in the liquor. 

5.  Label your jar and stick in a dark cool spot for a at least a month. 

Now, we wait…  So… How’ve you been?  How’s your mom?  Her new haircut is flattering…  She has great cheekbones.

Um…

I’ll have to test the extract when it’s done.  I’ll need to bake something to see how it tastes.  Any suggestions?  Leave them in the comments.

But, seriously, your mom looks great.